...i decided to pin this down simply just for my own refrence next time hopefully till i grow old.....i dont think any soul is still reading my blog...
...today is the second day that i lost her...NEO XUE WEI..00471z...someone whom im with for e past 3 years 9 months 24days..i wouldnt say e reason why...mayb is im too harsh...or u really did....but anyhow...u owe me an explaination...a clear cut explaination...i was the one who iniated the break up...however...u left without leaving any words behind..somehow..im realli disapointted...Nonetheless...here are some thoughts that i wish to share to u..if u ever remember that i have a blog here...if ever u happen to see this...BARBIE..i wanna tell u...until now...ure the girl i love the most....the one who can really tolerate my fucking temper..the one whose willing to do anything jus to make me happy...even tho u r a very quiet girl...u don like to express urself much..and always abit blur blur..but i know u r trying very hard to be my ideal girl..trying ur best to make me happy...u r the one who never talk back wenever i flare up...i really appreciate u alot...i swear from e bottom of my heart..i tout u were gonna be the one..the one that will spend e rest of my life with...e one who will hold my hand till our hair turns grey...i know i had been playing very very much lately...for the past 3 months? i have neglected u...i din give u the attention that u ever needed...im sorry barbie..im gonna say something that i tink u r never gonna believe it..but whether u believe it or not...barbie...on 5th of sept when i hug u in bed...i told myself n promise myself..im gonna stop playing..its time...time for me to stop...we'll go for movie n a good dinner n i will make it up to u for wat u had lost the 3 months...but i was late...too late....6 days in total....he got it right..he caught all ur attention when u needed it most...if we could jus hang on for jus 1 more day barbie....mayb things would have been much different...i swear im not lying...and i dont even know whether in this life if u will ever see this post...no point lying at this stage...this 2 days..i tried to be as cool as possible...i tried to swallow my tears into my stomach....its like everywhere i go theres a shadow & memories of u....every song i listen to jus make me think of u...1392days...it took me 6 months to woo u....1392days together with u....how long would it take for me to forget u? never....u will really be etched in somewhere of my heart...the first night without u by my bed side...i wouldnt dare to off the light...i feel so lonely..so not used to it...the only way is to treat ANGELA as u..plus my bolster...i cant slep...cant eat...BEER N CIGGY r my drugs...there was so many times i tried to turn to hug u...jus lik how TV always show...but u werent here..ur pillow...blanket...angela..all r still stain wif ur smell...i cant bear to change it..but soon..e smell wil go off..
...we officially broke off at 6th sept 0017hrs when ur sms reached my fone...before opening it...i was hoping u asked us for a cool off time period..n talk things out...but no.. it reads " i had taken all my stuffs alr.thanks for being there for me all these years..take good care..i hope we can still be friends.."my heart sank...at that point of time...i hope i can rush to u..hug u...and like the other time...telling u i cant bear u to go...but i stop myself..i told myself..it was my decision.! i gotta stand firm to it...i dunno y u don even bother to explain to me? izzit u really guilty? or ur conscious is clear..i dunno..i really dunno..u kept me hanging...BARBIE...remb how hard i persuaded u to stay wif me? e 100 reasons?
1 I wan to hug u
2 I wan u to hug me
3 I wan to see u
4 I wan u to see me
5 I wan u to kiss me
6 I wan to kiss u
7 I wan to cuddle u
8 I wan u to help me cut fingernail
9 I wan to see u in e night
10 I wan to see u in e morning
11 I wan to see u wen I open my eyes
12 I wan u to see me in e night
13 I wan u to see me wen u open ur eyes
14 I wan to hold ur hand
15 I wan u to hold my hand
16 I miss u
17 I love u
18 I like u
19 I wan to make breakfast for u
20 I wan u to eat e breakfast I made
21 I wan to share e whole night wif u
22 I wan u to share e whole nite wif me
23 I wan to sing u good nite song
24 I wan to tell u bed time story
25 I wan u to buff my fingernails
26 I wan to look into ur eyes
27 I wan u to look into my eyes
28 I wan to kiss u good nite
29 I wan u to kiss me good nite
30 I wan u to gif me morning kiss
31 I wan to gif u morning kiss
32 I wan to sae good nite to u face to face
33 I wan u to sae good nite to me face to face
34 I wan u to sae good morning to me face to face
35 I wan to sae good morning to u face to face
36 I wan to share bed wif u
37 I wan u to cuddle me
38 I wan u to see me in e morning
39 I wan to help u dig ur ear
40 I wan to help u massage
41 I wan u to help me massage
42 I wan to help u scratch back
43 I wan u to help me scratch back
44 I wan to tickle u
45 I wan u to tickle me
46 I wan to play ar zup with u
47 I wan to play bingo with u
48 I wan to play monopoly wif u
49 I wan to smell ur hair
50 I wan to play la bi wif u
51 I wan to play my nose wif urs
52 I wan to play wif ur eyes
53 I wan to play wif u mouth
54 I wan to bite ur tongue
55 I wan to bite ur lips
56 I wan to see u brush teeth in e morning
57 I wan u to see me brush teeth in e morning..
58 I wan u to bite my tongue
59 I wan u to bite my lips
60 I wan u to play wif my eyes
61 I wan u to sleep beside me
62 I wan to sleep beside u
63 I got nth to do
64 I wan to be wif u
65 I wan u to be wif me
66 I wan u to sit I squeeze to massage ur leg
67 I wan to watch tv wif u
68 I wan to listen songs tgt wif u
69 I wan to to talk wif u in e nite
70 I wan to talk to u so closely side by side
71 I wan to lie on u awhile
72 I wan u to lie on me awhile
73 I wan to make milo for u
74 I wan to drink milo wif u
75 I wan u to slap me
76 I wan u to pinch me
77 I wanna pinch u
78 I wan to slap u
79 I wan to bite ur backside
80 I wan u to bite my backside
81 I wan e feeling of only being wif u
82 I wan u to have e feeling of only being wif me
83 I wan to play play station wif u
84 I wan to dance wif u
85 I wan to teach u sing
86 I wan to hear u sae I love u before I slep face to face
87 I wan to sae I love u face to face
88 I wan to sae I miss u face to face
89 I wan to sae I need u face to face
90 I wan to grab u tightly wen u slep
91 I wan u to grab me
92 I wan to sae thank u to u face to face
93 I wan to help u put mascara
94 I wan u to help me put mascara
95 I wan to take photo wif u b4 bedtime
96 I wan to tell u how much I appreciate u face to face
97 I wan to stick my head so close to u
98 I wan ur head to stick close to me
99 I reali wan u to be by my side
100…I REALLY LOVE U!~! DARLING….heres 100 reasons for u…MuAcKx!
...here u go...remb how much joy n laughter we used to had? u say zou jiu zou...i really dunno if i shld hate u..1392 days baby...u can jus let it down to someone for jus 6days? 6 days? hmmm...if u could give me an ans...im waiting for u to call/sms me..im waiting..no matter wat im still gonna say...U HAVE BEEN A GOOD GF ALL ALONG...IM THE BAD GUY....BUT URE THE ONE WHO LET ME DOWN BARBIE....until u give me a jiao dai...i wil be thinking this way...
...NONETHELESS...i hope u will find the one that u truly love n truly love u who would treats u well in everything...i hereby sincerely wish that u will be happy and we can be the close friend we used to be even tho we missed our fate of being husband n wife...pls allow me to call u for the last time...BARBIE...i love u...
